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Monday, October 5th, 2009
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4:46 pm - sodomizing thrusts
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oh. hey there, sorry for the subject. didn't think anyone was reading. actually, is anyone?
somehow livejournal feels like a LOT better outlet for me than say...myspace, facebook, twitter and mtv's true life. i think instead of updating everybody with what im currently doing, i'd rather talk about my feelings. yea, my feelings.
so this overriding optimism that pervades my life, it may be just as bad as pessimism guiding my thoughts. breaking down piece by piece, my constant hope that there will be something better is turning into a bitter vision. no chance for happiness. i feel battered. all signs seem to suggest complete destruction. the only thing so agonizing is how slow it's moving.
the real hope in all of this is the chance to be around and pick up the pieces. wouldn't it be easier to start from scratch? the mountains of baggage that weigh down on me are inescapable. anywhere i go, i cannot go back.
current mood:  lonely
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| Saturday, July 1st, 2006
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12:22 am - still alive!
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ummm fuck, so im in my own place now with my very own girlfriend laying in bed next to me snoozing away for work tomorrow while im on unemployment but not worried about it because i dont fucking care about work anymore. besides, unemployment will last until september and it takes care of all the bills, and who said i couldnt go back to pimpin some hos and slangin some rocks to get some food to eat and take my girl somewhere nice? she just took this past week off to hang out with me. seriously it felt so good to actually spend some continuous time with one another on the same sleep schedule. the past five months have been a fair bit of hell in that way. saw superman returns on wednesday, the day it came out i think. no imax, that was all sold out in the morning. this was a shame after seeing how good movies look on imax with v for vendetta. anyways it was still fairly good. nancy hated it. but i think she liked aeon flux more than me, which is weird. i was disappointed is all, wanting more from the cartoon series. i dont know what to say in this thing anymore. jeje. i miss it though. and irc. im a sagittarius, always young at heart. i like eating sushi all the time. i occupy myself with air drums and contemplating the end of the world. laundry is always dangerous and computers are never reliable. i think thats why everyone is going crazy. people may break a promise but they wont corrupt all your music files in a transfer between hard drives because write cacheing was enabled. what os are people using now? xp? is vista out? i have no clue.
current mood: going to sleep
current music: flora purim
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| Sunday, January 1st, 2006
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4:19 am - its possible
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my new years resolution is to not view my poo before flushing. but it makes me wonder why people always make resolutions they cant keep. i dont want to think about what id be missing anyways. i mean id rather know what im missing by looking at it. my poo. im gonna look at it.
current mood:  blah
current music: spoon - i turn my camera on
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| Friday, November 11th, 2005
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9:38 pm - rotar
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LIVING INSIDE THE CONFINES OF EVERYTHING YOURE CONNECTED TO.
WEEEEE!!
current music: amon tobin - the lighthouse
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| Sunday, October 30th, 2005
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11:54 am - grab a handful
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first off, i love hot slut stories. even better is hearing them
through a hot girl. this is what i thought the case would be with
my girlfriend working with like five or six other girls at her
job. well, i would beg and plead for her to give me just one
juicy morsel of gossip to roll around in my head, but, no dice.
either they have a boyfriend or theyre married or they just dont know
how to sleep around. this all changed last night as one of her
coworkers, sivan, got laid! and with a boy that works just down
the hallway at the cafe. through my girlfriend, i get to hear all
the sweet, sweet details. its like, whuddup sex in the city.
i picked nancy up from work and ended up giving said hot slut and her
hot slut friend (ie. coworkers) a ride to the train. they were
all a giggly mess from drinking all day...ON THE JOB. it was
pretty funny how they called my van the "boom shikka boom shikka" van
like some porn music would come on when i opened the door and called
them in. we dropped them off and we were on the way to my
surprise dinner, at americas
first pizzeria. we got to skip the fifteen minute wait
but we had to ration off a chocolate bar in nancys purse during the
half hour wait for pizza! it was damn good. we rushed over
to sunshine after that to catch the 9:30 mirrormask and we made it at
9:29, but haha, the joke was on us! movie times were changed for
the weekend and the next show was at 10:10. i feel bad but i
dozed off maybe five times during the movie. not the movies
fault, it was spectacular. and it kinda fit in with my sleep
because the whole movie was done in dream logic and i would slip in and
out and it was all so surreal. if i dont see it again, im
definitely gonna buy it. maybe this is jim hensons comeback from
the grave, who knows?
i slept over at nancys house, even though her parents forbid it
now. im what, 23? =/ so we sneak me into her room, lock the
door, and wake up with her dad at the door trying to get in. well
her parents are strict and kinda have that asian "older generation"
thing going on so i nearly shit my pants. somehow we managed a
shower together, getting dressed, and getting me out of her house
unscathed! some fucking tight ninja skills there. then
there were like 20 people outside watching me run out of her house with
wet hair, holding clothes, and trying to get the other shoe on.
haha they must have thought we were having an affair or something.
THEN I ATE SOME TASTY MCDONALDS BREAKFAST AND READ COMIC BOOKS
now i have to go to work =(
by the way, isnt it true that driving is the best music video you can have?
current mood:  good
current music: eurythmics
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| Monday, October 10th, 2005
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2:35 pm - NEAT
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"From the intravenous injection site, drug-rich blood returns to the heart. The heart pumps this blood thourgh the lungs; from there it reenters the heart and then makes its way out to the rest of the body, including the brain. The time for this entire process, what physiologists call "arm-to-tongue time," is usually about 16 seconds."
current music: arch enemy - my apocalypse
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| Friday, September 30th, 2005
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9:36 pm
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sometimes i can still feel the first time hippies dropped acid in the 60s and the peace movement and tripping in the parks and free love and smoky rooms and bean bags and knowing that it all meant something more than anyone wanted to let on and it was all burning along like the incense everyone burnt up.
current mood:  nostalgic
current music: velvet underground - candy says
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| Friday, September 23rd, 2005
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7:36 pm - watch me, now and here, become a GIANT ASSHOLE!
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it is my constitutional right to be a racist. im sick of pc freaks. i hope all of you die, and more than that, i hope you beget racist children who destroy themselves in race wars!
my cock is an artifact of the heavens. it was sculpted by the hands of god himself into the magnificent, awe-inspiring monolith it is. it stands as the headstone to the mass grave of women slaughtered by its phallic cunning.
current music: at the drive in - lopsided
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| Sunday, September 18th, 2005
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10:40 am - count your lucky stars, theyre INFINITE
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i feel like burying myself in a mass of mediocrity today. like watching a captain planet marathon or reading three years worth of somebodys journal. secretly i want to finish reading watchmen, but the masochist in me says i shouldnt have it that good. also i want to pig out on some fast food, but again, the masochist.. i should sleep more, too, but since im getting up at 6:30am tomorrow and every day for the rest of my life, i might as well stick it out to go to bed early.
you know what IRKS me? all this shelter and housing provided to katrina victims. well what about all the other millions of homeless people? shouldnt there be some kind of first come first serve policy in place, so maybe the people who have been homeless for ten years get a place to stay before the just recently displaced homeless? yes, im sure those people didnt suffer any misfortune, they did it to themselves with their poor work ethic and lack of determination. so youre saying, "bitch! you were just complaining how the gubmint wasnt doing enough!" dont get me wrong, i know this is double sided, i think it just points out my gripe with society.. the contradictions that hide inside of it. how are my arguments never to conflict when theyre dealing with something that is inherently contradictory. like i want to eat the good stuff, but i dont want to be fat.. theres no winning see. so ill sit back with my cock out and pull out these complaints, as insightful as they may be, and no one will listen to me. im happy.
swingers was really good. i find it really strange how i only saw the parts where the guy with the ex girlfriend is on the phone with the answering machine up until now. i saw those two parts, but nothing in between. i dont know, im in love with vince vaughn, thats all i can say. mhmm check whose journal youre reading, its a guys. all of you are so money and you dont even know it. there was some really awesome sex last night, too. it makes me want to just lay out in the sun and evaporate. we did it in a dunkin donuts parking lot, once. it was filled with cars and people were coming and going constantly, making it a little nerve wracking but way exciting. haw! dunkin donuts...
current mood: grease and obese
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| Friday, September 9th, 2005
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6:06 pm - i guess i should update
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so ive been busy and it looks like im gonna stay busy.
new job driving a school bus which im liking so far. it pays pretty good and i get a lot of time to use how i see fit. for example, i have an hour and fifteen minutes between highschool kids and elementary school kids, so i can go to dunkin donuts or do errands or read, which is what i see myself doing mostly. but i think the next time one of you fucks decide to pull out in front of me last minute im NOT gonna drop the air brakes and save you the hassle of peeling your "big" suv off my front bumper. im driving your kids to school for christ sake.. gimme a break.
i got a new van.. i got through painting it matte black, and im going to get the windows done with limo tint next week. i want it to look like DEATH. its going to be the death star and if you get in the way of my tractor beam, death is what youll get! ..i think i just mixed star wars/trek references...oh well. i covered up all the writing with paint and removed all the shiny emblems, leaving nothing left to identify its presence but the vortex in your vision. muahahaha! oh yea it will make a nice lil love shack with the back seat pulled out. where do you find those 'dont come a knockin if the vans a rockin' stickers? only serious replies, please.
sunday were going to check out the midieval festival. i for one wonder how it will be different from ren faire. a whole day consisting of jousting and roasted meats, and its already purely awesome, but throw archery, sword fights, magic and wenches into the mix and this is a concoction...heh heh i said cock. I CANT WAIT.
umm maria full of grace isnt so good. i gave it three stars on netflix. it was like the whole movie was done with water colors instead of the vibrant sloppy thick paint it needed. not to take away from water colors, its just something vapid cant do.. convey shitting out 62 tubes of heroin and then seeing blood smeared all over the bathroom after some thugs slice your friend open for the drugs.
ok. time to go away now.
current music: daft punk - robot rock
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| Friday, July 22nd, 2005
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2:32 pm - it took a big black bald man to make me feel the rhythm
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went to see esthero last night. the first thing i have to mention is that esthero is not actually pronounced "ess tha row" but as "ess tear oh", the first negative of the night. she only played like three songs from breath from another, and the other 50,000 songs were from the new album. suckage. although, the songs i did wanna hear were really really awesome to hear live. but then the dumb bitch kept teasing us by singing itty bitty parts of old songs just in the middle of talking or in between songs. thats what got to me! then the cocktease would never make good on it! and there was a guy there with a fucking VINYL copy of breath from another.. imagine HIS disappointment! but she was hot, and she was funny, so i dont hate her. its just hard for me to understand why you would totally abandon such a good thing, be it seven years old. she was kickin that whole gangsta bitch thing a lil too much, also. she was saying something about how all girls want a lil "thug" in their men sometimes. blah. i have no interest in the new album at all. im just disappointed is all. but uh, yea! im back from the old country, and i dont think im gonna say anymore about it! (maybe i post some pics?)
ps prince paul was in the house! he kinda just slipped in and kept us entertained in between sets, mixing up some old ass hip hop classics. like the man behind de la soul, making us dance in public to house of pain and onyx and ll cool j.. o the humanity.
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mercifulcrap's journal